Monday, December 20th, 2010
Today I look a day over 40. Why? I am! Yesterday was my Big 4-0! Woot! Okay, enough joking around…
I’m more vain than I care to admit. A lot of whether or not I’m happy any given minute depends on how I feel I look physically. I’m not proud of it, but I’m not alone. With time I become much more accepting of my physical self, but I have a long way to go. Part of my problem is that I chose a profession with an element to it wherein my would-be “clients” shop with their eyes. So my love of good health and how to help others attain it has sort of shot me in the foot a little there with regard to where I wrap my self-esteem. I’m dealing with that in many ways. Aging helps and hinders the process, but it seems to be a forward-moving process, thankfully. And most who spend 5 minutes or more with me realize that I know what I’m talking about, thereby (I think) being less concerned with my physical imperfections. Assuming they were in the first place. Most of the time, I get a “Wow, you look great for 40!” so I think most of this is (and was and will be) of my own creation. Ironic considering how many would be surprised to how nonjudgmental I am of that sort of thing when it comes to other folks.
I gave up on perfect a long time ago. If we’re talking just about physical appearance, I looked about as perfect as I was ever going to look just a few years ago. I felt great about myself, much more confident. But that time period also put me in close contact with other women who were SO wrapped up in their physical appearance, that: a) They never looked good enough; b) There was nothing else to them. And how could there be? I know that for that brief blip on my 40 year screen, the extreme effort it took with nutrition and training to (naturally) achieve that extreme of a look felt like a part-time job. It was hard to foster any relationship unless it was with someone who shared the same pursuit at the time, or maintain an interest in something other than asparagus and interval cardio. Needless to say, it was not the time to take up a hobby. Unless you consider trying not to be a social leper at special events a “hobby”.
My first physique show. When I had the thought: "I love you, Honey, but I'd sell you for a cookie right now", I knew this would not be a long-term activity for me.
One thing that has really helped me embrace the “me” that’s more than the meat suit within which my spirit is housed is delving into interests beyond fitness. This year, for example, I’ve taken sewing lessons and I’ve even been painting with friends, something I can’t wait to do again! I’ve been much more social and I’m sinking my teeth into another aspect of my career—segueing it into something that will enable me to help people improve their health on a much deeper level. Not only will that stimulate my brain—something I need—but it will indirectly help me with my own psychosis, reinforcing to me that optimal (dare I say “radical”?) health goes way beyond one’s dress size or eyelash length. So in big and small ways, artsy-craftsy or extra-intellectual, I’m moving beyond what I see in the mirror. And where I work I’m quite literally surrounded by mirrors, so that’s no small feat.
Pillowcase I made for my hubs in sewing class. Hopefully that makes up for the sell-you-for-a-cookie thing...
Does this mean I’m packing it in to search for meaning outside of my bod? No, of course not. Without a really healthy physiology, how in the heck am I going to feel well, think well, function well—all necessary things for having the time, desire, and aptitude to do things outside of fitness activities. It just means I’ll care a little less about how I look while I’m doing them. If you are at all like me, I suggest reaching beyond what’s apparent to the naked eye, and realize that it’s okay to be a dynamic person devoting time and energy to varied interests. And that it’s not ALL about looking good… naked.
Picture I painted at Sips 'n Strokes with some great gal pals. It's "perfectly imperfect". (The "sips" part helps with its appearance. 
)
Tuesday, December 14th, 2010
With the New Year just around the corner – yikes – I’ve been taking stock of the past 12 months, looking at where I was at the start of 2010 and where I am now at the end. For those of you out there, like me, who keep track of your training, I urge you not to fall prey to the comparison game.
I’ve fallen into this trap many times. For example, last year at this time I was doing cardio 4 to 5 days/week. Right now I am lucky if I get in 3 days, sometimes its only 2. This is where the comparison begins and it is easy to want to beat myself up for not doing enough cardio. This is the type of behavior I need to knock off, and you likely do too.
Once I take a step back and look at the bigger training picture I also see that I am lifting 1-2 more days per week than I was last year at this time. But once I realize the switch in what I’m doing, I move onto the next comparison. In years past I would workout twice/day and now, that never happens. But again, there is a simple answer for that. First, I have been putting in more hours at work. Second, I have no desire to go back to the gym after work. Third, not working out twice per day has not negatively affected either my performance or my physique. And fourth, I have much more time to spend with friends and family.
However, regardless of whether I am doing more or less than I was a year ago, I need to stop the comparison. I am not the same person I was a year ago and neither are you. When I take a step back and look at what I want out of my life in this moment, the response is not the same as it was last year. As a result, my training is not going to be what it was a year ago either.
What is my point to all of this you ask? Too often we use our training as a measure of success. However, not in a way that is at all accurate. It would be one thing to set out a six-month goal and once those six months have passed, look to see if we achieved what we set out to. And if you are doing that, I applaud you. That is a rational way to measure your training. But that is not the measuring most of us are doing. Most of us are taking and comparing only one aspect of our lives – ignoring everything else that was going at the times of comparison.
Last year you might have just finished training for a marathon and this year you did not. Last year you might have been working on improving strength and this year you are working on improving speed. Last year you might have been unemployed and this year you might be working 80 hours/week. Regardless of the specifics, you are comparing apples to oranges.
In the end of the day, the best thing to do is sit back and look at where you were, as an entire person, 12 months ago and compare that to where you are now. Once you have that baseline, then you can move down to the specifics of training. Now, and only now, can you say “hey, I’ve been slacking and that’s unacceptable” or “hey, I’ve been slacking but that’s because I am now a part of this great non-profit organization that takes up my time after work so I can only get in my training in the morning, and that is more than acceptable.” But had you not assessed your life as a whole, you never would have been able to realize your charity work is eating into your training time and you are ok with that trade. Only after we assess our lives as a whole can we really make any realistic conclusions.
And in my case, last year I had just come back from the Women’s Tri-Fitness and was on a cardio tear like no other. I am much happier now that I have a more manageable schedule and more balance in my life. Especially when at the end of the day, my level of fitness has not changed and I train just as hard! If you don’t believe me, go do the functional workout I posted right after thanksgiving . This is not a free-for-all excuse for not getting it done. However, if you are reading this blog, you are probably like me and not one slack off and look for excuses. Instead you work hard at every aspect of your life, rarely giving yourself props but constantly finding reasons to cut yourself down. And using your training (or anything else) to do that is not ok, so let’s all (as Jodi would say) knock it off. I’ll try my best to do so and urge you to as well.
Thursday, November 11th, 2010
I am going to have to ‘fess some things up to you just to give you an idea of where I am coming from today: 1) I am an offensive driver (not OHfensive, but Awwfensive–get it straight;) 2) I drive at all times with the mindset of getting from point A to point B–no fiddling around and 3) I am a stickler about the rules of the road. KNOW what they are. And I need to give you one more piece of info to make this all come together…I live in Massachusets. So to say being in the car with me is an adventure in and of itself is an understatement. For Heaven’s sake, my car has a name. And better yet, it’s name is Whippy. Are you hearing me?
Every week day I drive my kids to school–who by the way note the difference between the way I drive and my husband drives with comments like, “We’re never late with mama” and “Are you gonna take that from him?” Shame…clearly some unlearning I need to do there.;) But we have perfected the school route to eliminate as many rotaries, merges, long stretches of road that can be abused by *really* slow people, long lights and places of confusion as possible. Driving them now is much less painful than before when we had to go through 2 rotaries.
I have no idea where you live so I am not sure if you even know what a rotary is, but some places call them round abouts or traffic circles whereas I call them the dumbest thing ever invented in driving history. The concept: A big circle that people enter into to keep the flow of traffic moving in an intersection that calls for a good amount of turns. The rules: The people *continuing* the rotary have the right of way and those entering the rotary must “yield”. The way it used to go down: barrel into a rotary full steam ahead and hope and pray you don’t hit anyone and get out the same way you got in. Somehow there has been enough accidents and signage in MA to make that lunacy stop. Now, the new lunacy: treat the yield sign as a stop sign and come to a complete stop whether there is someone in the rotary or not and jack up all the traffic behind you because you wait for all the traffic in the state of MA to get IN to the rotary before you even *think* of hopping in. OY VEY! Not an adequate solution people. The best thing to do was to know what yield means and who has the right of way. If you respect those laws then the flow would be normal and natural. When you choose to ignore the traffic rules, there is always someone there–not saying me (whistling right now and clearing throat) to remind you that you have zero business being on the road.
YIELD: When you see a yield sign you are to slow down and be PREPARED to stop but stopping MAY NOT be necessary. This means as you come to the rotary you note if anyone is currently in it. If they are not, then you do not have to stop, you may just continue on as you normally were and head on to your destination. If there is someone then you YIELD to them–but just them. You do not need to lie down and play dead for the rest of the time in the car and wait for cars that may be in NH to enter the rotary. We are such an ALL or NONE society! Very little YIN and YANG!
Why do I take time to point this out to you? Am I really trying to turn this blog into a driving blog? Umm no. But what a metaphor driving provides for the follies of life! Let’s see how this applies:
Ok…I’m done. This started out a simple post and clearly I need therapy. I need to move from MA and get away from all rotaries and I need to hide under my couch from folks who do not understand the art of yielding.
All jokes aside, what I want for you more than I want anything is to learn how to listen to your inner self and yield to it. Stop letting the world dictate your life. You only want those things when you are there that day in front of it. The rest of the time, you are yielding to your true wants and desires. Stand strong and stay focused. Learn to love yourself and the track you’re on enough that when someone else or something else presents you something different you do not cave and make that your new goal. In the mean time, do not stop at a yield sign unless you need to yield or I will drive over you and wave while doing so. Tootles!
Tuesday, November 2nd, 2010
Last week I asked how much it takes to effectuate change. In that post I espoused on how sometimes we are scared to trust that the plan in place will work – and even more-so we are scared to do the bare minimum to trigger that change, thinking we need to move from one extreme to the other.
This week I’m piggy backing off that topic and going to touch upon those who are scared to give up what they are doing and try something new. For me, this came in when Jodi and I were having that conversation where she said to just add one more day of lifting to my program to see if that would trigger the change I wanted. I had been lifting twice/week and doing two plyo/agility/speed workouts (along with cardio and yoga). Thus, my follow up question to Jodi was, if I lift three days, should I keep in the two functional sessions? She hesitated and structured her response in a way that let me know I did not have to, but if I absolutely wanted to, I had to make sure at least one was more cardio in nature.
I walked away from the conversation knowing that I would be lifting three times and getting in, at a minimum, one day of plyos with the hopes of two. However, I haven’t dropped that type of training down to once/week in um…..the past 3-4 years! Making this change really scared me. With that being said, I knew to trust in the plan Jodi and I put in place. Further, if I really wanted to, I would make my two functional sessions work.
Thankfully I was able to stop being scared and move forward with the plan as decided – and have been ok with only getting one functional in per week for the past two weeks. Try as I might, work has kept me uber busy and I just couldn’t get the second in. That is not to say I won’t keep pushing to make it happen – but I know that extra session is just a bonus.
I learned, however, that the sky did not fall when I changed up the structure of my training, despite my fear. However, I know this many people are unable to do the same. So often we either don’t want to admit that what we are currently doing is not working, so we refuse to change (wait, isn’t that the definition of insanity, doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result); or we are simply scared to make the change simply because we are afraid to try and fail. Whatever the reason is, it is not a fun place to be. So here comes my challenge for this week….
Last week I challenged you to trust in the process, regardless if it was with respect to an athletic/physique goal or some other goal. This week I challenge you to look at what part of the process you wrote off and stop writing it off. I am sure there is something – not taking the rest day you have been prescribed, not wanting to eat as much as your nutrition calls for, wanting to jump from point A to Z without stopping off at the steps in between, simply refusing to do X, Y, or Z because you have a good reason which is really just an excuse, or whatever else other process you are not entirely adhering too. Whatever your something is – stop running scared and move forward toward you goal!
Thursday, October 28th, 2010
I am coming off of a high.
Why you say? Because Heather was here and for a moment I had all my girls here at one time. It was awesome and we do not do it often enough. We’ll have to fix that next year.
In the mean time I want to know what you are holding onto right now and why? Is it worth it to you or no?
The cool thing about having Heather come up, for me, is she brings with her a barrel of laughs. If you can just imagine, we all get along really well and we laugh alot when we’re together and I treasure that. While Heather is here she stays with me which means I have the honor of driving her all over the city as we go on our daily jaunts about town. This means she is subject to Whippy–my go-cart with a trunk. I LOOOOOOOOVE Whippy. She is my car and she is rightfully and frightfully named.
Whippy is quick. She’s fast, too, but more importantly she’s quick. She is faithful and she is true. She is also as comfortable as a too small shoe on a foot with bunions. I’m just puttin’ that out there for you. Get the visual.
Whippy is an 8 year old Mazda Protege with 200,000 miles on her. There is nothing fancy about Whippy. I have 3 kids and I pack them in the back like an extra outfit packed in a too full suitcase and the sad thing is…they are used to it! I think if I bought a newer car with more space, they’d bounce around the back like germs in a petri dish. Poor things. May be scarred for life.
But I wouldn’t part with Whippy if you paid me $100 (although I’m not saying that if you paid me more I wouldn’t consider it…). She is everything I want and need in a car and I couldn’t ask for more. Well, I could ask for suspension so that Heather didn’t whip from side to side when we take turns but that’s neither here nor there. My point is: I don’t need more than what I have. What I find with people is that are always wanting and needing something new because what they currently have “isn’t working for them” when that simply isn’t the case. Most likely what you have has either lost its ‘new’ appeal or now you are into the hard part and you want to change. Stop looking for the latest diet, the newest exercise technique, a new goal, a new race, a new outfit (hmmm…wait…got a bit excited there. There is always room for a new outfit.), a new food and so on. Accept what you have because many times it is the right thing to have at that time and you are either being impatient with a situation or blind to the benefits.
What prompts us to go on a search many times is stress otherwise known as loss of control. Feeling helpless at work suddenly makes your weight loss goals more important. If you can’t keep the drama at bay at your workplace, maybe a new excerise plan will help. The problem with that is that it’s not the problem so you never come to a “solution” doing that. You just keep bouncing around further adding to your stress. Ask yourself:
Am I getting results?
Have I given this plan enough time?
Am I really following it or am I going through the motions because I am already convinced it’s not for me?
Do I really need to switch and if so, am I doing it for the right reasons?
The offseason is here for many of us and this is when we find ourselves all over the place. We have some time off and we immediately find ourselves refreshed and wanting to be back out there without finishing our commitment to our offseason plan. And it’s only been a month! This is normal and happens to so many folks that it should be a documented phenomenom. All I can say is stay focused. You will love what you accomplish over the long haul if you stay focused and engaged. Don’t give up on your offseason plan because you are bored, anxious or just wanting the newest trend. Slow and steady wins the race–like Whippy! She’s taken many a folk out on the Audobon. Let me tell ya!
If you do not have an offseason plan or really know that the one you have is not effective, hit us up at info@modelper4mance.com. We have a myriad of new plans coming out that are not listed, yet, and they can truly get you from point A to B. Or, I can pick you up in W
